This time last year, I was packing up my house and preparing to move from Portland to San Francisco. I was nervous about the move, and wasn't 100% sure if it was the right thing to do. I'd lived in San Francisco before, and I wasn't a fan then. Would it be the right decision now, nearly five years later"
I don't think I can answer that honestly without disappointing everybody and myself, but let's put it this way: Everybody loves a good movie montage. You know, the kind where the dorky, scrawny nerd spends the summer training hard to become the high school's winning quarterback, or where the spunky, multicultural ethnic kids band together and fix up the old man's house" Well, real life seldom turns out like that.
Because it turns out that I don?t have the moxie that I once did. When I was 22, 23, or heck, even 26, moving to a new city to pursue a career was easier to do. But now that I've started to sprout roots ? a house with a custom kitchen designed for this blog, a city I will always call home, a partner of almost six years, a furry ginger creature that's dependent on me completely ? the game has changed for me. The struggle was no longer new and exciting, and the rewards didn't seem to outweigh the costs at all. Instead, all that hustle just felt like an unnecessary burden.
One that was hard to carry, especially by myself.
So I took a step back and decided that it was time to stop breaking my own heart and do the right thing for myself ? in a little more than a month, I'm moving to New York City.
New York isn't home, but it'll be closer to something like it with Erlend and his family there. This past year in San Francisco has been quiet and lonely in a million ways, and I learned how heartbreaking it is to prioritize a career over a place to call home. But honestly, even as I type this, I feel all the weight and mistakes from the last year lightening already. I?m incredibly grateful and th...